Preparing for a second, third, or fourth birth looks very different from preparing for your first.
There isn’t always time to spend hours reading birth books or attending weekly classes. Your older child (or children!) needs you, your energy levels may be lower, and birth preparation often slips to the bottom of the to-do list.
Perhaps your antenatal course last time didn’t quite give you everything you needed. Maybe you’re finding it difficult to think about this birth because of something that happened in your previous one. Or perhaps you’ve simply assumed, “I’ve done this before,” while quietly wondering if you’re really ready.
The truth is, every birth deserves its own preparation. YOU deserve the space and time heading into this birth, and the next transitional moment.
Journalling doesn’t require lots of time or expensive resources – just a quiet moment to sit, acknowledge your previous experience, and make space for the birth that’s to come.
Create Your Space
Find 20-30 minutes when you can. The space does not need to be perfect, but you will need quiet with little interruption.
Light a candle if you’d like. Put on some soft music. Diffuse your favourite essential oil or light some incense if the candle isn’t fragranced. Make yourself a warm drink, take a few slow, deep breaths, and allow your shoulders to soften.
Then, with a notebook and pen, simply write.
There are no rules. Your words don’t need to make sense, be beautifully written, or even form complete sentences. Let whatever comes to mind flow onto the page. Smile, cry, be angry – let all the emotions surface and recognise them.
Choose whichever prompts speak to you, you don’t need to answer every one.
Journal Prompts
Looking Back
- What stands out most when I think about my last birth?
- What parts of that experience am I proud of?
- Is there anything I’m still carrying that I’d like to acknowledge or let go of?
Looking Within
- What feels most important to me for this birth?
- What would help me feel safe, calm and supported?
- What strengths did I discover in my previous birth that I can carry with me this time?
Looking Forward
- What kind of birth environment am I hoping to create?
- How do I want to feel during labour and birth?
- What am I most looking forward to about meeting this baby?
- If fear wasn’t leading the way, what would I hope for this birth?
One Final Reflection
Finish by writing this sentence and see where it takes you:
“This time, I choose…”
Don’t overthink it. Simply let the words come.
Remember…
Your next birth is not a replay of your last one.
You bring new knowledge, new confidence, and a deeper understanding of yourself into this pregnancy. Even if parts of your previous experience still feel tender, they do not have to define what comes next.
Taking just a few quiet moments to reflect can help you process the past, reconnect with your instincts, and approach this birth with greater understanding and confidence.
Preparation doesn’t have to be perfect or time-consuming.
Sometimes, all it takes is a notebook, a quiet corner, and the permission to listen to yourself.
Rachel x
If you’re preparing for a subsequent birth, find out more about my second-time parents Refresher Antenatal Course, offering recap of hypnobirthing and birth pre essentials alongside reflective exercises like this. Available as a group and privately at your home or online.
